Home Health Topics How to Deal with Gaslighting and Get Help

How to Deal with Gaslighting and Get Help

by Gauri Kolhe

Have you ever heard about Gaslighting form anyone? If not than this article will be helpful to you know about gaslighting.

Gaslighting is a kind of manipulation in emotional behavior arises due to the emotional abuse that has been seen in an abusive relationship.

This situation is associated with the forceful emotional manipulation in a person forcing them to change their thoughts, questioning the thoughts, memories, and events surrounding them. The person suffering from gaslighting or victim of gaslighting pushed to limit where he can be put question of self sanity.

The term “gaslighting” come in existence from a play and subsequent movie named “Gaslight.” This movie defines gaslighting appropriately. The story plot based on how a devious husband manipulates and torments the emotions of his wife by convincing her that she’s is a mad person.               

Whether is intentional or not gaslighting is a form of manipulation. Gaslighting can be seen in much kind of relationships such as at workplace your boss manipulates you, your friend tries to manipulate you or your parents force you to do something according to their own thoughts. But most of the devastating cases of gaslighting have been seen relationship between the couples.   

Symptoms of Gaslighting 

The author of the book “The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life,” Dr. Robin stern, PhD said about the signs that indicates you are a victim of gaslighting. The symptoms are including following:

  • If you are feeling that you are no longer the person you used to be. It could be symptom of gaslighting.
  • Being more anxious and less confident than you used to be also a symptom of gaslighting.
  • Being too sensitive is also a sign of gaslighting.
  • If you have a feeling that you are doing wrong also indicates the gaslighting.
  • If you are used to apologizing often and thinking that all the wrong things happens because of you.
  • Experiencing having a sense of something wrong but unable to identify it.
  • Making excuses justifying your partner’s behavior towards you.
  • Trying to avoid talking your personal life with your friends and family about your partner.
  • Have a feeling of isolated from family and friend is also a symptom of gaslighting.
  • Start to lost interest activities you used to enjoy usually and feeling hopeless. 

Examples of gaslighting

The person gaslighting other become expert in manipulating you by pushing your weak points knowing your sensitivities, vulnerabilities. The make you feel doubting on your memory, judgment, sanity or even yourself. Some of the examples of gaslighting are as below:
             

  • People make you feel trivial. For example: you should feel sorry for yourself.
  • Telling people about backbiting: if someone tells you that people are talking your back or talking about you.
  • Another example of gaslighting is like hiding the objects and keep teling you that why can’t you find that? This makes you lost your confidence.
  • Proving wrong your statements also another example of gaslighting. For example you are saying that you already submitted the assignment but that person keep saying that you’re lying or something like that.
  • “Seriously you don’t want to go with me, should have known you are crazy person”. This kind of statement also is examples of gaslighting.   

How Gaslighting related with Narcissism

The people who used to manipulate people or gaslight people may have some kind of psychological disorder that is known as narcissistic personality disorder.  

This kind of people always believes that they are the most precious and special people. They are used to seek attention praise by doing anything beyond the limit sometimes.  Narcissistic people become jealous and envious easily and they can do anything to manipulate you to overcome that.

How to get help

As Gaslighting is a very problematic condition. Although treatment of gaslighting is hard but leave it untreated worsen the condition.

First of all you have to take initial step to recognize what’s wrong with you after finding if you are a victim in your relationship you should proceed to get help. You should talk to your therapist, psychologist and psychiatrist.

They will help you for sure to get out of this condition. They ask you some questions about your life and relationship. After that they can help you to recover from the fears, doubts and help you to understand the realities of your life and make you feel confident.

Talking to your friends and family members also help you to overcome the gaslighting.

So feel free to talk to your friends and therapist.

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